Hundreds of people asked me why someone has an eating disorder. Of course, many problems are involved, but from my exploration of this field over the years, I have concluded that everyone I have met has an outstanding theme of eating disorders. In the early part of their lives, people suffering from eating disorders experienced an inexorable border intrusion at all levels on an ongoing basis
when their physical, emotional, psychological, intellectual, sexual, and creative boundaries have been ignored and infiltrated. All border intrusions. Uncontrollable, unable to end, protest, and even often admit this invasion, these people feel helpless, desperate and confident that they are worthless to themselves or anyone else.
The consequences of this total invasion are vast. One consequence is eating disorders. Having experienced so many boundaries being ignored, a person does not have the knowledge or skills to recognize or respect his boundaries. She may starve or starve due to emotional relief
She may eat large amounts of food alone to gain comfort. Before life is in danger, she may deprive her of her food. She does not have an internal regulatory agency and tells her when she has reached her limit and has sufficient experience. Ignoring any boundaries means ignoring any restrictions.
She likes to eat a compulsory overdone diet whenever and wherever she wants. She chooses her own choice based on self-treatment issues rather than physical hunger.
Anorexia sufferers do not eat. There is no limit to her not eating. In order to relieve her emotional pain, she would starve herself. She knew nothing about sufficient experience. She cannot say "enough" to the aggressor, and she cannot speak to herself. Sufficient concept does not make sense for her. She often feels that if she "disappears", she may find some permanent comfort.
I've heard countless anorectic young women talking softly and losing the angelic smile of a beautiful world. It will become a kind of steam or faint dance spirit in the clouds. Ah, what they imagine is this spiritual happiness. In fact, this is the ultimate act of self-protection, completely destroying their bodies and lives. Then they can really get rid of the resurrection life.
Gluttony eats too much. She will attack herself with more food than her body can tolerate. If only due to bloating, forced over-eating eventually had to stop eating. Her body set a final limit. Bulimia does not have this restriction. She experienced (in her mind) the consequences of no food attacking her body. When her body cannot afford more, she will spit everything out. Then she will resume her carnival. She may reach her physical limit several times. She can vomit again and continue every time.
In the end she stopped because she was already exhausted or she was in danger of being found. "Enough" does not make sense to her. There is no limit to her ignoring her boundaries, and she has no consequences.
Of course, the reality has many consequences. Her behavior caused a serious injury to her body. Every time she attacks herself by carnival and cleaning, she destroys her spirit, soul, self-esteem, reason, health, and value to herself and others.
Every violation deepens her ritualistic behavior and she becomes more stubborn. The result is more and more painful and desperate. However, eating disorders are not the cause of this pain and despair. The presence of eating disorders made her numb from the already existing psychological pain.
Over time, perhaps years, eating disorders successfully prevented her unbearable sense of pain. But eventually, the protective device for eating disorders becomes another border intruder, this time it is self-induced, which will weaken and damage her.
I mean that the border invades history? Open and extreme border violations involve sexual harassment, sexual abuse and physical abuse. There are already many articles on these areas, especially on the materials for exploring post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and dissociative identity disorder (DID). Use your search engine to find some quality information posted on the Internet in these subject areas.
However, there are other types of border violations that are not so compelling, less discussed, more general, and destructive to people. When in the name of custody, the person in power takes over the life of a young man, it constitutes a border intrusion.
When others deny her privacy, read her diary, arbitrarily borrow or take away her stuff, or use their thoughts or goals or personality to overwhelm her efforts in school or in sports, which is against her Of the boundaries.
When others ignore or despise her choice or deny that she has any control over her life, clothes, food, friends and activities, they invade her boundaries
When in the name of the carer, people do not bear themselves The boundary intrusion also occurs when her responsibilities and her actions have no consequences. When a child or a teenager can have everything she desires without trying to earn such a gift, she knows nothing about personal effort, limitations, consequences, or enough meaning. If she wants something, she will get it. that's it. If someone picks up her clothes, does laundry, repairs cars, pays bills, lends money to her and does not expect them to come back, she has no boundaries or restrictions.
If she does not have to abide by her promises, if she does not pay attention to her caring behavior, she will find that her relationship with others is useless. The only thing she can surely know is that there is no limit to her behavior or desire.
These border intrusions are not acts of love, nor are they overly indulged in a "love" of a child. On the contrary, they ignore behavior. The child's taste, mind, ability to learn, and ability to grow and operate as an independent agent in the world are still not recognized
when others, even well-intentioned people, ignore her as a unique, developing and The personal identity of the ability to overwhelm her with their personal agenda, she felt as if the road roller had pacified her. She may learn to please, manipulate, compete or control, but she cannot learn how to fully present herself in this world as her true self.
She didn't know her meaning and value. She does not know that she can put this meaning and value in her work to achieve the goal.
For example, if she breaks something, whether it is a lamp, a car, her words or the hearts of others, it uses her own resources and her own creativity to make her responsible for necessary repairs. In this process, she learned what hard work means. She understands what the responsibility and consequence of the action mean. She learned reasonable limits and reasonable expectations. Shhe develops resources to make health and care decisions in the future.
Without these lessons, she learned the skills to quickly adapt to others' expectations or to manipulate what they wanted. These are all poor and non-substantive tools in building adult life.
As time goes on, she may gradually realize this. But without boundaries, she only becomes confused and anxious. She will speed up her eating disorders to eliminate anxiety. She will use her manipulative skills to get what she wants from anyone who can use it.
As time goes by, fewer and fewer people in her life, they will be manipulated. The quality of her colleagues' circle will decline as she seeks to control those who are not in a functioning manner in the world. She will find herself in a bad company. T
This becomes more dependent on eating disorders to gain comfort. People around her have always been less reliable. In the end, they only tolerated her existence because she could manipulate her.
She arrived at the location of the general victim. Her manipulation skills are counterproductive. There are people in this world who are more adept at manipulating and using. She found them. She became their goal and then became their prey. Her dependence on eating disorders has become her most valuable and trustworthy relationship.
In the early days of her development, she learned her inability to assert herself through large-scale border intrusions (which at the time may seem ordinary and not important). She learned that she does not have a private or sacred space to cherish and respect. She could not even admit that she was defeated, invaded, controlled, manipulated, and forced to deny the great aspects of her self. In addition to observing the rules, she did not pursue the right
in order to successfully realize her natural tastes, curiosity and tendency and her pain in suppressing natural tendency, she developed an eating disorder. Since she was older and her manipulation skills also disappointed her, she would have to rely on her eating disorders. This may be the most critical moment in this person's life.
If her pain and despair are terrible and she is convinced that she cannot tolerate this lifestyle, she still has a choice. She can continue to rely on eating disorders and go the path of self-destruction in this way. Or she can reach out and seek help.
This is a difficult position for her. She never knew what was enough. However, to choose to get help, she must realize that she has had enough pain. She never knew what was the limit. But she must realize that she has reached the limit and must choose between death and life. She only knows to pretend and manipulate. However, she must be honest with real help.
Before she surpassed her life style, she felt very painful and painful until her recovery and recovery. She is approaching something she could not imagine. People with eating disorders can hardly decide to seek help. She must convince herself that someone understands her true personality.
She still does not know that people who respect and respect the borders do exist in this world. She still does not know who can and will respect and cherish the inner space of her most intimate and sacred. She still does not know that one day, the reliable, respectful, determined and capable caregivers she needs can become themselves.
She needs courage for her first recovery. Her primordial fear or anger, she summoned her courage to help.
Difficult, yes. But what she did not know was that she was brave all her life. When she learned that she was able to apply her strength and courage to her health, she discovered a great discovery.
Professional resources looking for help
College of Eating Disorders (AED)
Professional resources looking for help
American Anorexia and Eulimasia Association (AABA)
Anorexia nervosa and related diseases (ANRED)
Edreferral.com
International Association of Eating Disorders Experts (IAEDP)
Joanna Poppink's list of abnormal diet resources hospitalization plan
National Institute of Eating Disorders (NEDA)
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Orignal From: The leading cause of developing eating disorders
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